Tuesday, September 30, 2008


So here's the awesome way I started my morning today.

It took me a million years to get dressed because I hated everything I put on. When I finally got dressed, I really only had time for a quick breakfast. So I pulled a frozen bagel out of the freezer. I was using a butter knife to try and pry the sucker apart when suddenly the knife slipped and shot right up my arm, leaving a long cut on my forearm. THANK GOD IT WAS ONLY A BUTTER KNIFE. It was really just like a scratch, but I put a bandage on it just so it wouldn't get irritated during the day.

So now I'll have to explain the bandage on my wrist to people. Which is funny in the most horrible way possible. I always injure myself in the most embarrassing ways. Yay!

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Best morning EVAR.

I woke up with my ear hurting. Then I came out to the living room and was just hanging out when my eye got really itchy. Without even thinking about it, I rubbed my eye. Which is now completely red and starting to swell up. I am out of allergy meds. And now my ears are itchy.


Saturday, September 27, 2008

Oh, Twitter. You're so crazy!

Every once in awhile someone will reply to something I've posted to Twitter. Today I got two, both of which made me laugh... for entirely different reasons. I wrote:

I am not "single and ready to mingle." More like "single and NOT ready to mingle due to crippling fear of rejection and/or intimacy."

One reply was "I think I may get this tattooed on my ass." Which is funny for obvious reasons. But then there is the other one... which is REALLY hilarious:

"So sad. Hang in there."

Oh, man. The best part about it is that I can't tell if they were trying to be funny or expressing genuine concern... which is also funny because that would mean that they couldn't tell if I was joking.

Internet + sarcasm = AWESOME

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Dear Science

I suppose you could say that TV on the Radio had me at hello. Because let's face it, if you name your album "Dear Science" you fricking know I'm going to be all over that shit. It just came out today, and I have been listening to it non-stop on their MySpace page.

HOLY SHIT, DO I LOVE THIS ALBUM. I imagined I would, since I have fallen madly in love with every song I have ever heard from this band. But still, it's nice to feel so happy and in love with a brand new piece of music. They have gotten a little funkier... and have increased the presence of horns, which automatically gets you high fives. (I am a sucker for a solid horn line.)

Call me old fashioned, but when I truly love an album I feel as though I need to have an actual hard copy of it. I can't handle only having it digitally. I need to be able to hold it in my hands, and carefully inspect the liner notes during the first listen. I love that feeling. Hence why I am probably going to take a bus allllll the way downtown after work today just so I can buy it. And while I am there, I might as well look for some new pants or something, right? Right.

In the meantime, you can watch this rad video and reach the same conclusion I have: IT IS AWESOME.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Oh, Autumn. You are a saucy little minx, aren't you?

As soon as I stepped out of the house this morning I felt it. It bit my nose, then my cheeks, then my exposed fingers. It was... cold air! OH, THE HORROR!

The entire time I was waiting for the bus, or walking to work this morning was spent shivering away under my light jacket. I suppose it's nearly time to bust out the wool pea coat.

But worse than just being cold is the fact that I feel like I may be getting one. Today I have been blessed with the arrival of post-nasal drip, plugged up ears and a little bit of achey-ness.

The only good part about it, is that it is now officially soup-making season. I could seriously survive off of soup alone. And I probably will, at least until March.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Relax. Don't do it.

That is what I kept repeating to myself all day. I was telling myself not to start screaming my face off in a fit of rage.

I kept it together. I knew I would be able to, since this morning I managed to pick out a fairly cute "Who me? I'm not bloated and homicidal today. EVERYTHING IS COOL, MAN." outfit. I even smiled at someone!

Yayyyyyyyy. Now to go home, have some tea and take a muscle relaxant. All I have to say about that is, "FUCK YEAH."

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Imagine me as the newspaper stand guy or the fishmonger...

So I read some blogs today and as a result, I can't stop singing this song in my head:

Congratulations, buddies!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Making with the typey-type.

I recently referred to myself in conversation as a "frustrated writer". I was talking about myself in terms of my career, I suppose, because I do not get paid to write. (Aside from the $2 I have made through ads... THANKS FOR CLICKING, BTW!)

But after I said it, I kept thinking about that phrase and why I said it. I was talking about why I started blogging. Basically, this whole thing truly was born out of frustration. I was feeling creatively stifled. So I fixed it by hopping on here every day and writing about how much I love George Clooney. Or how mad I got at some jerk on the bus. And as stupid and mundane as these topics may be to some people, it has actually helped. A lot.

I have been posting less often here, because as you may have noticed, I'm using Twitter. It's great for me, because sometimes I am just not capable of long-form thinking. And I find it REALLY challenging to have to re-think, re-word and edit myself down to a mere 140 characters. I kind of love it. You might want to give it a go yourself!

I am just now starting to grow more comfortable with myself as a writer. The thought of people reading what I have written is not nearly as terrifying as it once was. So, I guess the point of all of this is to say that I'm not so frustrated anymore. And I finally consider myself to be a writer. Thanks for helping me get there, friends.

Monday, September 15, 2008

26 is the new 25.

(And in my case, 27 is the new 26.)

I'm keeping it rolling with the birthday posts, because... well... because I like them. What better way to show someone you care than to write about them on the Internet? THERE IS NO BETTER WAY.

So, ANYWAYS... today is Amanda's birthday! She is totally a year younger than me! And it doesn't even make me mad, because she is awesome! In keeping with the birthday traditions, I made her a card on the computer. My MS Paint skills are second to none.

I think this is some of my best work yet. I really took it to the next level by drawing in the birthday hats. (I know. It's hard to believe it, but they are not really wearing those in the original photograph.)

So, Happy B-day Amanda! I hope you like fireworks...

Sunday, September 14, 2008

In Memoriam

Last night I attended a funeral. A funeral for the youth of my friend, whom we shall call "The Dude". You see, he turned 30 this week, therefore causing his youth to perish.

It was the best funeral I've ever been to. (Even during the time St. Elmo's Fire was playing. WTF, dude?) His youth was eulogized in a hilarious fashion and I think he was sufficiently humiliated. And sufficiently drunk.

So, Dude... here's to your youth. May you remember it fondly... and perhaps actually start to grow up a little. Heck, I'm WAY younger than you are, and I've already started going to bed at a reasonable hour. Even on weekends. I KNOW, RIGHT????

Also, Happy Birthday! As promised, my gift to you is your VERY OWN BLOG POST!!!! I hope you enjoy it. You can even bookmark this bitch and look at it every day. It really is the gift that keeps on giving.

Friday, September 12, 2008

All for you

So,I guess I didn't mention the most AWESOME thing to happen to me in like, a million years. I went to the Janet Jackson concert!

OMG, it was RAD. I had never seen anything like it! Costume changes! A catwalk! Set changes! DANCING!

It was so great. I danced my butt off the entire time. And I squealed whenever I noticed that she was using the original choreography to a song. (Which was like, all of them.) Because I know these things. I may or may not have spent a lot of time in my youth trying to learn the choreography from all of her videos. Because I'm awesome.

I'm so happy that I finally got to see her, and I'm even more happy that I got to share the experience with Steph. There's no other person I would have rather gone with. Mostly because she also knows all the choreography and understands what it means to see Rhythm Nation IN PERSON.

Here's a little sample of Nasty:

I hope I look that good when I'm 42. Hot damn!

*ahem ahem*

I am hella busy today, so until I have time to write about some crap I will leave you with this... which totally rules.

Make sure you watch the whole thing... cause the big payoff doesn't come in right away.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Take it easy.

For someone who can be considered to be a bit of a music nerd, it is embarrassing for me to admit how badly organized my collection is at the moment. My Cd's have migrated to places all over my room and are no longer in alphabetical order. My mp3's are no better. I still have a bunch of shitty quality files that I never bothered to re-download or delete, mislabeled files and have incomplete information! It's all just because I'm lazy.

As a result of the mp3 related laziness, some pretty stupid files have made their way onto my iPod. Every time one of them pops up I think to myself, "Gah! DELETE!" and then I promptly forget to do it. I've also not bothered to transfer all my Cd's over to my computer either. It's all just a big ol' mess. Which is why, on mornings when I am on my way to work, it is so completely amazing for the shuffle mode to not pick up any of the files that irritate me so! It was nothing but AWESOME all the way to work. It made me so happy.

Here are some of the highlights:

The last one is especially rad. I find it very hard not to dance to that one. (Note the video, featuring my wicked hot boyfriend, Ed O'Brien. YEOW!)

Saturday, September 06, 2008

If I needed an alibi, I'd be screwed.

A hypothetical interrogation by the Imaginary Police:

IP: "What did you do last night?"

ME: "Ummmm... you know. Just went out. Did some fun stuff. CRAZY FUN STUFF."

IP: "Really? You didn't just get some take out and watch TV by yourself all night?"

ME: "Well... okay. Yeah. I ate White Spot. It was AWESOME."

IP: "What did you watch?"

ME: "Just The Outsiders... and The Daily Show. And then I went to bed. I swear. Right after that."


ME: "Yes. Right after. I swear. *cough* Can I get some water?"

IP: "Sure. Right after you tell the truth."

ME: "Ummm. What? Ummm... I *cough* I am telling the truth..."

IP: "Are you sure? Are you sure you didn't stay up until 3am watching "She's The Man" starring Amanda Bynes?"

ME: "What???? That's... that's crazy!" *gulp*


ME: "Ummm... I'd like a lawyer..."



IP: "HA! You liked it?"

ME: "Amanda Bynes is a great comedic talent, okay? And that Channing Tatum dude is severely hot! Oh my god. Am I going to jail?"

IP: "You will only be imprisoned by your own shame."

Friday, September 05, 2008

Stay gold, Ponyboy.

In my grade 12 yearbook a friend of mine who was a year behind me in school wrote, "Stay gold, Ponyboy." I have always thought it was terribly clever of him. Cause you know, I was leaving high school and who the heck knew if we were ever going to run into each other again? (I DID stay gold, btw.)

ANYWAYS... in case you didn't remember, that quote comes from The Outsiders. Which I am watching right now. I am thinking about 2 things right now:

a) WTF ever happened to C. Thomas Howell? Like, after that friggin weird movie where he dyed his skin to pretend he was black?

b) Ummmm... knowing what Leif Garrett looks like NOW I kind of want to throw up for thinking this, but whoa. Was that dude ever hot back in 1983! Check it out:

Well, hello there. I like your plaid shirt. Let's date, you drunken fool!

Also, I totally just spotted a very young Sofia Coppola. Totally didn't know she was in this movie. It's kind of awesome. You should watch it. Even if you hate the book it's worth it just to see the hotties. (Yay, Ralph Macchio!)

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Correction: 9021-OH YEAH!

Ummmm... was it just me or was it kind of awesome? About 2 mins into the show my sister sent me a text message that read:

"Zuckerman? Haha!"

To which I later replied with:

"Ha! Stupid Nat can't make the new kind of coffee!"

I knew it was going to be awesome as soon as Lucille Bluth came stumbling out of the mansion as the drunk grandma.

Excellent. Just Excellent.

Monday, September 01, 2008

9021 uh-oh!


It was so sad. For reals.

I can just tell this new version is going to TOTALLY SUCK compared to the old one. I'll watch it anyways... but seriously, the first time someone smokes pot and everyone else is shocked I'm so bailing!