Wednesday, December 31, 2008

The man just asked you a question... answer him!

This was a Gap commercial from YEARS ago... but I always think of it when New Year's Eve rolls around. I just think it's so lovely. There is a full length version of this kicking around somewhere, but I just love the actual commercial so much.



So, what ARE you doing? Making out? Dancing? Making out while dancing?

I went out for some yummy sushi with Lydia and Kelly, and then came right back home to put on my sweatpants. I am kind of finding myself longing to be at a great big ol' dance party, but I am just not feeling well. I think my body needs tea and rest. But I seriously wish it needed beer and booty shaking. *le sigh* (Holy crap, that's a tweet. I'm using it. Look for it on the sidebar to your left in like 5 mins! LOL)

Will one of you take me to a dance party next year? I promise I'll try my hardest not to get sick.

Ice, ice baby.

The sidewalks are a slippery mess today. I nearly fell on the way to the bus stop about 3 times! Oy.

So like, Happy New Year or whatever. Got any big plans? I do not. As of this moment, I still do not know what the hell I am going to do tonight. My car is still not about to be driven anywhere, due to the icyness, so if I DO dare to leave the house it will be somewhere close to home.

Also, I am sick. My thoughtful family decided that they needed to pass on this wicked awesome cold to me. Yay! This makes me not want to venture too far from home. Mostly because the thought of not sleeping in my own bed when I feel like this is not appealing.

So whatever you do tonight, have fun! Think of me at midnight... I will probably be in bed in a NyQuil induced haze. WORD.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Good God, you all!

So I was at work today and I heard this song on the radio:



The actual song itself is enough to make me laugh. But it is especially bad because pretty much every time I hear it I think of this:




Man alive. I need help.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

*whew*

Friends, I have finally made it back home!

I couldn't get home on Boxing Day cause it was too snowy and my Dad didn't feel like driving me home. I didn't come home on Saturday because we decided that it would be much more fun for me to stay another night so that we could go shopping on Sunday morning.

Despite all the rain yesterday, the streets all around my neighborhood are still TERRIBLE! My mom could only get the minivan about a block away from my house, (any closer and we surely would have been stuck!) so I had to grab as much as I could carry and run it into my house before going back for the rest of it. Thankfully, my sister helped me out, so it was much faster.

Now I'm finally home. I'll admit, it was actually really fun being stranded with my family. I got to play in the snow with my sister and nephew on Christmas Eve, play Wii all morning and eat dinner with my giant family on Christmas, spend an entire day in pj's and sweatpants with my mom on Boxing Day, play in the snow some more with my Dad and my dog, and go shopping with my Mom and sister! *whew*

And NOW... it's laundry time. The fun just does not stop with me.

Friday, December 26, 2008

On snow.

As you can gather from my last post, Christmas Eve had me quite stressed out. By the time I got out to my parents' house I was tried, hungry and miserable. 

But, in the end it was worth it. It was so much fun spending Christmas Eve and morning with my parents, sister, and my brother and his family. My nephew is 5 now, and it was pretty fun watching him get SO EXCITED about the whole thing.

My parents got a Wii for my brother's family and so you can guess what we did all morning. And now I want one. So fun! My nephew turned out to have a natural ability to kick ass at Wii Boxing, which was 100% hilarious to watch. 

It is snowing AGAIN as I speak, so it looks like I'm here for another night at least. Which isn't the WORST thing ever cause my mom is cooking another turkey for dinner! Nom nom nom.   

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Suck it, Christmas.

I know. You are all, "Whoa, you are such a Grinch for posting that title on Christmas Eve!" And me? I'm all, "Yeah? Well, SUCK IT!"

If you had been through what I had been through today, you might also be of the same mindset. 

Since it was snowing like a mother-you-know-what-er, the snow on my unplowed side street was just far too deep for me to get my car out. So I was forbidden by my mother from trying to drive. My dad was being grumpy and refused to come pick me up. So this meant that my only option was to get on the old Skytrain. Which NORMALLY would have been fine. 

I made it to the train station in good time, but as soon as I got there the platform was PACKED with people. This meant that when the train finally did get there, I could not get on the train with my two giant bags because people are all self-serving assholes and budged in front of me even though I had been waiting for WAY longer then they had. 

After 3 trains passed me in 30 mins, one of them came back into the station backwards. A tree had fallen on the tracks and they couldn't move eastbound until it was cleared, which would take 30 mins. A bunch of people bailed at that point, freeing up just enough space for me to stand with my giant bags and my giant purse. 

An hour later I am still standing on the train. They assure us it is almost done. 

2 hours later, and seriously REALLY almost done. "You might as well keep waiting. It won't be long now!"

3 hours later and it FINALLY gets moving. After 2 stops I finally got a seat and was able to sit for the rest of the ride out to Surrey.

By the time I finally set foot in my parents' house it was a full 5 hours after I had left my house. I had been standing for 3 hours and hadn't eaten since breakfast at 7:30am. So yes, I yelled on the phone at my mom and sister. I'm not going to apologize for it either. 

So yeah. SUCK IT, CHRISTMAS.

Enjoy your white Christmas...

... IF YOU CAN ACTUALLY GET TO IT!

Oh sweet baby Jesus. On this, the eve of your non-literal birthday, I am SCREWED. As of this moment, I have no idea how I will be getting to my parents' house in the burbs. My mother has told me that I am not allowed to drive because she is afraid. So here's hoping that I don't have to brave the buses and that my Dad will come and get me!

Eeeeek!

I must say, though... it *does* look mighty pretty out there. You know what? The snow is like those really super good-looking guys who are total a-holes. Nice to look at, but do you REALLY want to deal with that shit? It's a tough call, really.

Also, MERRY CHRISTMAS or whatevs.
Kisses!

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Captain Obvious

Well, shoot. How did I not notice this RIGHT AWAY???? This is exactly the sort of thing I am normally able to pick up on immediately. I've failed you, dear readers.

ANYWAYS, have a look and see what I'm talking about. IT IS SO OBVIOUS!!!!



Single ladies love FOSSE!

I'm seriously disappointed in myself for missing this at first. Wah. You are a clever one, Beyonce. If there was ever a pop star who could handle Fosse rip off choreography, it is you. I bow at your feet.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

My mommy loves me.

Conversation with my mother from this weekend:

MOM: "After this year, I'm done with stockings. DONE. Your brother and Ashley live together, so they can take care of their own stockings. Same with your sister. She'll be living with Myles by then so they are on their own!"

ME: "..."

MOM: "I'll just do one for your father... and don't worry, I guess I can still do one for you too."

ME: "Wow. Okay. Thanks Mom. I'M SORRY I'M SUCH A BURDEN TO YOU."

MOM: "It's okay."

LOLZ! She loves me so much that she has committed to filling my stocking until I reach the age of 60, at which point we will re-evaluate the situation. HAHAHA! BEING SINGLE IS SO HILARIOUS!

Monday, December 15, 2008

Something to keep you warm.

Because it is SO FLIPPING COLD OUTSIDE!!!!!!!!!



You just TRY not dancing your butt off when you listen to this. (NOTE: I have tried. All attempts were unsuccessful. Which is actually kind of a victory, so yay for me!)

Enjoy! And don't forget to take a sweater. Or like, 7.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Somebody call 911!

Backdraft is totally on TV right now. Have you seen it? It is a film from long, long ago... back when Billy was totally the hottest of all the Baldwin brothers. It's true. There was a time in the 90's where he totally took over the title from Alec. It was awesome. Here's proof:




Damn. That is one good movie. Complete with an action montage set to a song about feelings. It doesn't get much better than that.

Sadly, time has not been totally kind to Billy. He is no longer reigns supreme in the Baldwin family. I think we can all agree that Alec has reclaimed the title of "Hottest Baldwin Brother By Far". Here's proof:



You know I'm right.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

I knew that wasn't a total waste of time!

I am referring to two things with the above statement:

1) The 5 friggin years I spent in college, AND
2) All that time I have spent watching Mad Men over the past year.


Whaaaaaaa? How could those things possibly be related? Well, in January I will be moving into a new job. Which is actually *sort of* the same job I have now... except that I get to write. As a job. Writing. For money. (I KNOW, RIGHT?????)

I spent 5 friggin years in college so that I could learn how to communicate effectively via the written word. Which suddenly doesn't seem so stupid anymore. AND all that time I spent watching Mad Men actually turned out to be research. For my job. As a writer. (I KNOW, RIGHT???)

This is going to be crazy. Or one might also say it will be "of unsound mind". That's right, bitches. I know how to use a thesaurus.

Fast is the new regular speed.

Hey, what has two thumbs and up until about 20 mins ago was totally wearing her shirt inside out?

This guy. (girl)

*groan*

I should also mention that when I came upon the sign that said "SIDEWALK CLOSED" just around the corner from work, I just stood there for a minute thinking "WELL NOW HOW AM I GOING TO GET OVER THERE????" Try crossing the street or walking around the back way, idiot!

This day is going to be AWESOME.

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Nom nom nom.


Macaroni and cheese
Originally uploaded by JuJu Coop
I eated this.

It is macaroni and cheese! With cheese cascading down the sides!

It is from Burgoo, and it was THE BEST.

OMG, I TOTES FORGOT TO TELL YOU THIS!!!

I should have mentioned this AGES ago... but I be forgetful, yo!

If you wish to check it out, you can also find me blogging over at the magnificent jcritty.com! It is the home of the podcast "JCritty's Talk Chat" and a few other awesome bloggers. Check it out, if you are so inclined. Critty is an awesome dude and makes me laugh my face off on a regular basis.

Yayyyyyyy!

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

I think maybe I'm tired.

Okay. So first things first. In order to understand the following hilarious transcription of Facebook interaction, you will need to know who Galen Weston is.
























Laaaaaaaadies! He's totally hot, right?


So, ANYWAYS... I noticed that my sister had this awesome quote on her Facebook profile. "Bullshit you had the flu! You had the I'm afraid of Patrick Swayze!" So I wrote this note on her wall:

Hey dorkus. Question: Where did you hear the quote you have about Swayze??? That shit is funny. FACT: A young Patrick Swayze can be seen as a backup dancer in the video for the Toto hit "Rosanna". YOU DID NOT KNOW THAT, DID YOU?

She then explained that it was from an episode of Trailer Park Boys. But that is not the point. After I wrote that, I totally got the song Rosanna stuck in my head. So I re-wrote the lyrics and posted it as my status:

Sarah ♪will meet you all the way, *DA-NA-NA!* Galen Wes-ton, yeah...♫.

Then when she asked me if I meant the guy from President's Choice I said "Indeed. He's so hot he's making me sexist. BOOM!"

And then I LOL'd for reals.

THE END.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Dream a little dream of Wolverine...

Here is the last thing I remember from my dream before my alarm went off this morning. It was awesome:

So I'm sitting there talking to Hugh Jackman, who is in character as Wolverine, but is not *actually* Wolverine, so I'm calling him Hugh the whole time. He doesn't seem to mind this.

ME: "Dude, you totally have like, the best sideburns EVER."

HJ: "I know, right? Why do you think I keep agreeing to make these movies? It ain't for the richness of the plot, if you know what I'm saying..."

ME: "But seriously. If I were a guy and I wanted facial hair, that is totally how I would do it up. Mega Super Chin Strap Sideburns!"

HJ: "Personally, I don't understand why more people don't rock this look."

ME: "It really is a shame."

HJ: "You know who would look totally awesome with these Mega Super Chin Strap Sideburns? That friend of yours who likes all the nerd comics and stuff. Dave?"

ME: "DUUUUUUUUUUUDE."

HJ: "I know."

ME: "If anyone on this planet ever tried to grow those and wear that look un-ironically it would be him."

HJ: "I'm pretty sure that is his destiny."

ME: "Hugh, you are so right. So very, very right..."

BEEP BEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

That is when my alarm went off. Then I woke up and sat there for a minute trying to figure out why the crap I was dreaming about friggin' Wolverine and then I was all, OH YEAH I TOTALLY WATCHED HEROES RIGHT BEFORE I WENT TO BED.

The end.

Monday, December 01, 2008

Back in the saddle again.

Today was my first day back at work from my super awesome staycation. This working thing is less than awesome. I feel very sleepy and have a severe case of the "I don't want to be heres". I thought I had found the cure for those (which was applesauce) but I was wrong. It just made my tummy a little upset... so now I REALLY don't want to be here.

But there is good news, friends! My friend who currently lives in northern Alberta (gah!) just called me and she is in town. She is coming to pick me up at work and has promised me things such as tea and wonderful chats. Yay! This is also awesome because it means that I don't have to carry a giant sewing machine home on the bus. WOOT. (That is not as weird as it sounds. A lovely coworker of mine is letting me borrow her sewing machine while she is on vacation for a month. So she left it for me at work. RAD!)

The only thing I have to remember is to make sure I do not drink any caffeinated tea. I had some trouble getting back into my regular sleeping patterns last night. Frig. I mean, who actually gets up before 11am if they don't have to? NOT THIS KID.