Wednesday, October 25, 2006

This one is for all the lovers out there...

Yesterday when I got on the bus to go home, I saw something so bizarre that I almost couldn't believe it.

Through the window of the Dairy Queen I saw a couple sitting in the back corner booth. They were sharing a banana split. I bet you know how I felt about that. If you said "Awwwww that is soooooooooo adorable!" THEN YOU HAVE SERIOUS ISSUES. Quite frankly, I found the whole scene appalling. Sharing ice cream... WHATEVER! If I'm going to Dairy Queen, you're damn right I'm getting my OWN ice cream. Pffffft.

But seriously... why is it that people who are in looooooooooooove have to friggin SHOW it all the time? I don't need to see that, man. Keep it to yourself. I mean, I really love yams but you don't hear me talking about it all the time, do you? I don't carry yams around in my purse so that I can caress them in public spaces, do I? NO. BECAUSE THAT IS WEIRD. SO MAYBE YOU SHOULD NOT DO THAT WITH PEOPLE EITHER.

I think I have found a solution that will allow lovers and haters to each live in peace... send the lovers to Virginia. Apparently, Virginia is just for them. I saw it on a t-shirt. That way, the rest of us who are not in love will be free to have swinging good times without ever having to be reminded of our un-coupledness. WOOT.

3 comments:

platypus said...

I've seen you do unspeakable things to Yams. UN-FREAKING-SPEAKABLE. Sometimes, when I'm alone, I get scared because I can still smell what you did.

sarah said...

SO I ACCIDENTALLY BURNED SOME YAMS IN THE MICROWAVE LIKE 5 MONTHS AGO. WHY WON'T YOU JUST LET IT GO??????

Lydia said...

See, my issue is that they were having a banana split at Dairy Queen. That's edible oil topping there, not whipped cream. COME ON. YOU CAN DO BETTER.
I recently tried something there that wasn't a blizzard, and it was really good. It involved hot fudge and caramel and pecans. Yum!
(Notice how I avoid the issue of gooey couples. Although I don't think sharing dessert is all that gooey.)