Thursday, January 31, 2008

I'm in ur akshun film, dressin inappropriately. loltomcruise!

Top Gun. Awesome movie. It really takes me back to simpler times... times when Tom Cruise was not EFFING CRAZY, therefore allowing us to fully appreciate his hotness. Those were the days...

ANYWAYS... so I was watching it again tonight and my favourite part came along: the volleyball scene. (You know what I'm talking about, right ladies? Eh? Yeah.) As I was sitting there watching a shirtless Tom Cruise, Val Kilmer... and that other dude... who is not as famous... looking pretty hot with their volleyball skillz, it suddenly dawned on me.

The volleyball scene is really freaking wierd.

It really doesn't make much sense. First off, they had to have realized that when you put in a scene involving shirtless men with glistening torsos in a DUDE MOVIE that it is completely homoerotic. Was that the point? Or did they put it in there just for the ladies? Though it should be noted that there is a LOT of flexing going on there... yet there are no ladies watching them in the stands. Interesting, no? However, that is not the issue here. The issue is the wardrobe.

If you watch said scene, you will notice the sensible Goose (Anthony Edwards) wearing functional and practical volleyball playing attire. Sweet neon shorts and weird t-shirt with no sleeves. Makes sense. Good for movement and is appropriate for the weather.

Due to the fact that a) Goose is in shorts (as are all spectators), b) the sun is out and c) the other three dudes are not wearing shirts, we can determine that it was indeed very hot outside at the time of this volleyball game. So why in the heck are Iceman (Kilmer) and whats-his-face (whats-his-face) wearing sweatpants? Obviously shorts would have been a way better choice. Logic dictates that if it were indeed hot enough to necessitate the removal of shirts that one would certainly not choose warm pants, especially when engaging in physical activity. I mean, SERIOUSLY.

But those two idiots are not the worst offenders here. It is Maverick (Tom Cruise), who for some reason thinks it is way normal to play beach volleyball in tight jeans. TIGHT JEANS!!!! Any sane, sensible individual would surely know that it is highly illogical to play volleyball in tight jeans, what with all the lunging, jumping and bending that goes on there. GOD! It's called common sense, US NAVY! Do they let ANYONE into Top Gun? Apparently they do, since Maverick is clearly an idiot.

Judge for yourself, friends:

BUT... who am I to argue with highly qualified fictional fighter pilots? They are so hot smart.


Lydia said...

Love the title. Sweet!

sarah said...

I thought you would. lolcatz!

Anonymous said...

I agree...the volleyball scene is a little spooky. Kind of reminds me of the '...on a steel horse I ride...' lyric. questions abound.