Tuesday, August 15, 2006


Get ready kids, for the BEST NEWS EVER!

Dancing With the Stars is coming back again for a new season. I have never watched it, but you can bet your butt I'll be watching it this time. Why? Because of this asshole:

Tucker Carlson, giant turd.

That's right children. Tucker Carlson is taking a short hiatus from his career as a professional douchebag (read: conservative pundit) to compete on television for a trophy with a disco ball on it. This is fantastic! I mean, it was already waaaaayyyy too easy to make fun of this guy and now this? He's just GIVING it away! He's like the town whore for jokes about himself!

I imagine that at this very moment, Jon Stewart is running around Manhattan tossing out candy and flower pedals and squealing with glee. I wish I was there with him.

I anticipate that Tucker will likely need a makeover before the show starts. Here is how it will go: "Alright, so let's see what we've got here... lose the suits, put on some sequins, for gods sake cut the hair, and one more thing: Stop being such a dick."

Heh. This is going to be seriously awesome. I love it when uptight white people try to dance. But does he really stand a chance? Not when you are dancing off again Mario fricken Lopez. GOOD LUCK! Have you not SEEN the slater dance? The dude has moves. Serious moves.


Anonymous said...

he looks constipated. perhaps some exlax is in order.

Mary said...
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