Tuesday, August 15, 2006

OMIGODOMIGODOMIGODOMIGOD!

Get ready kids, for the BEST NEWS EVER!

Dancing With the Stars is coming back again for a new season. I have never watched it, but you can bet your butt I'll be watching it this time. Why? Because of this asshole:

















Tucker Carlson, giant turd.

That's right children. Tucker Carlson is taking a short hiatus from his career as a professional douchebag (read: conservative pundit) to compete on television for a trophy with a disco ball on it. This is fantastic! I mean, it was already waaaaayyyy too easy to make fun of this guy and now this? He's just GIVING it away! He's like the town whore for jokes about himself!

I imagine that at this very moment, Jon Stewart is running around Manhattan tossing out candy and flower pedals and squealing with glee. I wish I was there with him.

I anticipate that Tucker will likely need a makeover before the show starts. Here is how it will go: "Alright, so let's see what we've got here... lose the suits, put on some sequins, for gods sake cut the hair, and one more thing: Stop being such a dick."

Heh. This is going to be seriously awesome. I love it when uptight white people try to dance. But does he really stand a chance? Not when you are dancing off again Mario fricken Lopez. GOOD LUCK! Have you not SEEN the slater dance? The dude has moves. Serious moves.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

he looks constipated. perhaps some exlax is in order.

Mary said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.