Earmuffs!

Remember in the movie Old School how whenever they were about to say something inappropriate for young ears that they said to the kid, "Earmuffs." and would give the kid time to cover his ears before they started saying these horrible things?

I totally wish people would do that to me.

Mostly because people walk by my office and start conversations that inevitably turn gross (GROSS!) and then I am left with horrendous visuals in my brain that prevent me from sleeping at night.












I need time to facilitate this. PLEASE.

So please, people... before you start talking about any of the following:

• comments directed at anyone over the age of 40 that contain sexual connotations (unless we are talking about George Clooney, I DON'T NEED TO KNOW ABOUT IT.)
• bare butts
• menopause symptoms
• health concerns involving the colon or urinary tract
• body hair

Please give me fair warning to whip out the earmuffs or RUN THE HELL AWAY FROM YOU before you taint my mind with your filthy words.

That is all.