Monday, August 21, 2006

Just (don't) do it.

I just read something on the internet regarding a girl named Misty. After reading that name, I completely lost all interest in the contents of the actual story because I was so distracted by the name Misty.

I think that is one of the worst names you could possibly give to a child. It sounds like the name of a pet. Heck, I wouldn't even name my pet Misty! If my parents had named me Misty I can pretty much guarantee you that we would now be estranged.

Naming your child Misty is a recipe for disaster. Nothing good will come of it, I assure you. Misty lives in 1992, because that was maybe the only time in which it would have passed for being a cool name. Misty has frizzy hair with stand up 80's bangs. Misty wears neon and acid wash without the slightest hint of irony.

I say this because I know people who will be having babies soon. To my knowledge, none of them are considering Misty as a name choice. (Mind you, none of them live in trailers either.) But if you are or ever were considering Misty, please reconsider. For the love of god, reconsider!

I will even offer up some lovely alternatives:

Gretchen
Dolores
Gertrude
Mary-Margaret-Katherine-Elizabeth
Mulva

See? All great options. Thank you for your time.

PS: Don't even get all up in my grill if you happen to be named Misty. Because you know you hate it too.

PPS: If your mom, sister, best friend or whatever happens to be named Misty you better not try getting all up in my grill either. It is a stupid name, and you know it! Feel free to rant about how dumb my name is if you like. I agree with you, SO THERE!

3 comments:

Lydia said...

There was a girl in one of my elementary school classes named Misty, and I vaguely remember her being a bitch. That name truly died out along with Tiffany and names ending in i (ie Debbi.)

Dave said...

Yo, hey Eli is a good name and Levi and and Pi. Okay Pi is only a good name if you are a fictional character in a novel and Levi is nowhere near as good as Levon (go Elton!) but still good.

I knew a girl named Mitzi once(That ends in I). Which I think is awful. I think it would be a terrible experience growing up with a name that is basically only appropriate for Poodles or Shi-Tzus.

I don't know what all the hating is for Misty though. You automatically have a song with your name in the title and there are way shittier names. Like Ethel, Agnes, or Inez.

sarah said...

Every girl I have ever met that was named Misty was a total idiot. I remember one girl named Misty from elementary school that I thought looked like a rat. She was a jerk. I guess that's why.