Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Oh boy.

I consider myself to be a feminist. I think women are wonderful. But allow me to be honest for a moment: Sometimes being a girl is just straight up LAME.

Maybe it's just me, but I feel like I will probably always be plagued with a certain level of insecurity about the way I look. I don't see myself ever getting over that. When I use the rational, logical part of my brain to ponder this, I can see how ridiculous it is. Is anyone really going to hate me because of the little scar I have below my bottom lip? Will I actually explode if I wear a bathing suit in public and someone sees my giant thighs? Probably not. But sometimes these certainly feel like very real possibilities.

I have days where I look in the mirror and think that I am THE SHIT. As in, "Holy sweet goddamn, has anyone ever looked this good? NO. JUST YOU, HOT STUFF." However, for every one of those days, there are probably 20 others where I curse my genetic makeup because all I see is a tummy that sticks out too much, a weird looking face and a saggy bum. I think it's just something I'll always have to deal with and no amount of compliments will ever fix it. I guess it's just part of being a girl.

That being said, my hair does look very nice today. And my eyes are looking exceptionally blue.

But this shirt makes me look fat.


Anonymous said...

WHOA! Hold up! You have a tiny scar below your bottom lip??

I'm out.

Well, wait, how did you get it? I need more scars so women will think I'm a big bowl of tough, instead of a big bowl of not tough nerd

sarah said...

It's not a very cool story. On my 21st birthday I was in Sydney and I was all, "DUDE. I AM SO GETTING MY LIP PIERCED FOR MY BIRTHDAY."

So I did. Then I had to take it out 3 years later. So I have a little scar.

The end.

brie said...

Having walked behind you on more than one occasion I can ass-ure you that your butt does not sag. Not that I spend all my time looking at your butt while I'm walking behind you. Just a little bit of time.

And, as if you don't know this already, having insecurities doesn't make you any less of a feminist. If anything you're acknowledging the pressure put on women (including yourself) by society to look a certain way.

sarah said...

You are right, Brie. It just seems a little odd to be a feminist who whines about being a girl, you know?

If anything, this has made me realize that perhaps I need to rethink what my own perceptions of beauty are. Maybe they have become a little distorted.

And thanks for checking out my ass, BTW. Yours is also quite nice.

Anonymous said...

I am a little in love with this post.

Anonymous said...

How did this post get so many comments? I thought the agreed response when women start to talk like this was to hide in the corner wearing a tin hat.

One more now. Damn.

superstar said...

This is anorexia writ small, no?